Goodbye!
2 tahun yang lalu
I’ve had read this book a few years ago. The title of this book is Why Forgive by Johann Christoph Arnold. The content of this book really touches me. Actually I want to share my opinion about this book a long time ago, but yeah, I don’t have time, well, not really have no time, but I am a lil’ bit lazy to write. So now, I think this is just the right time to write it down.
This book consists of stories about people who struggle to forgive another who has hurt them badly. I think what these people have done – forgiving – is really really a wonderful thing, because I myself find it difficult to forgive someone who hurt me. I rather choose to revenge than forgive. I think it’s normal. We are not an angel, we always response to people in the same way they have did to us, if they are good to us, we will be good to them, and vice versa, if they are did something bad to us, and then we will revenge them, and sometimes we revenge them more worst than they have done to us. In my opinion, that is humanity. Hehehehe,, that’s my opinion, you can have other opinion.
Well, after read this book, I rethink again about revenge someone. It’s hard to forgive. I don’t want to make excuses for myself by saying that I am a human who have feeling, and I don’t want to be hurt and I am not an angel. But, usually I use those excuses when I found it’s difficult to forgive someone. Arghhhh, I know, I know, I’m being inconsistent, but at least I am trying to forgive, although I failed more often.
Okay, now we’re back to this book. I will write done one story about forgiving.
Believe in Miracles
Gordon Wilson held his daughter’s hand as they lay trapped beneath a mountain of rubble. It was 1987, and he and Marie had been attending a peaceful memorial service in Enniskillen, Northern Ireland, when a terrorist bomb went off. By the end of the day Marie and nine other civilians were dead, and sixty-three had been hospitalized for injuries.
Amazingly, Gordon refused to retaliate, saying that angry words could neither restore his daughter nor bring peace to Belfast. Only hours after the bombing, he told BBC reporters:
I have lost my daughter, and we shall miss her. But I bear no ill will. I bear no grudge… That will not bring her back...Don’t ask me, please, for a purpose…I don’t have an answer. But I know there has to be a plan. If I didn’t think of that, I would commit suicide. It’s part of a greater plan…and we shall meet again.
Later, Gordon said that his words were not intended as a theological response to his daughter’s murderer. He had simply blurted them out from the depth of his heart. In the days and weeks that followed the bombing, he struggled to live up to his words. It wasn’t easy, but they were something to hang on to, something to keep him afloat in the dark hours when grief overwhelmed him.
He knew that the terrorists who took his daughter’s life were anything but remorseful, and he maintained that they should be punished and imprisoned. Even so, he refused to seek revenge.
Those who have to account for this deed will have to face a judgement of God, which is way beyond my forgiveness…It would be wrong for me to give any impression that gunmen and bombers should be allowed to walk the streets freely. But…whether or not they are judged here on earth by a court of law…I do my very best in human terms to show forgiveness…The last word rests with God.
Gordon was misunderstood and ridiculed by many because of his stand, but he says that without having made a decision to forgive, he never could have accepted the fact that his daughter was never coming back. Nor could be have found the freedom to move on. Forgiving also had a positive effect that reached beyond his personal life. At least temporarily, his words broke the cycle of killing and revenge; the local Protestant paramilitary leadership felt so convicted by his courage that they did not retaliate.
Can you imagine that?? How could a father forgive the person who killed his daughter?? Maybe we will think that he is not even a father, how could he do that to his daughter? Why doesn’t he take revenge in the name of his daughter?? I feel Gordon is the stupid father. He has no courage to revenge. Arggghhhh.. It’s killing me to see the path that Gordon takes.
It’s hard for me to accept the way that Gordon choose which is to forgive his daughter’s murderer. But, actually what Gordon has done is just such an amazing thing. Not everyone can forgive the way Gordon had done. It takes a lot of courage to forgive, really a lot of courage that not everyone has it in their life. And Gordon is not stupid; he is the wisest father actually, because he can think clearly in that condition.
I know that forgiving will help us to move on. I know that but I just can’t apply it in my life, not now, I guess, but the more hatred I felt, the worst feeling I got. I can’t move on. It tortures me-the feeling of hatred- but I and most of people in the world choose to live up our hatred in ourselves.
Sometimes I think that, there are no useful to hate someone or to revenge someone. Maybe we will satisfy when we succeed to revenge them, and then what??? Did we get any advantage?? NO!!! Even in my experience, after revenge someone I feel regret. I feel like, oh my God, how can I do that to him/her?? And do you think if you feel sorry of what you have done to someone, it will end the hatred?? What if that the person you have revenge can’t accept what you have to them and want to revenge you back?? And he/she did. They revenge you back. What will you do then?? Revenge them back?? It will not stop. It’s just like a vicious circle. You did something bad to me and I will revenge you, and then you revenge me back, and so. Well if that’s happen in your live, I can tell you this: you will not move on, you will stick in where you were now, no peace in your life. Only hate. And that’s not good. It will torture you. You even get mad, sick and never feel happy in your life. Of course you don’t want that happen in your life. We want to be happy, everyone does. And I think one thing to be happy is to forgive. I know it’s hard, but it’s worth. Let us try our best to forgive. First try to forgive ourselves. I think if we can forgive, this world will be a better place to live.
How should you forgive and why? I can’t tell you. It’s probably the hardest thing you’ll ever attempt to do. But I can tell you what I’ve seen and experience personally; once you are able to let go of wrongs that have been done to you, it changes everything. It will change your relationships, your attitudes, and your emotional make-up – your whole approach to living. It will give you a better life. Plus you’ll find that when you forgive, you’re always a winner. You don’t lose a thing. Because it’s not a sign of weakness to love somebody who hurts you. It’s a sign of strength. –Steven D. McDonald, the foreword in Why Forgive–
Forgiveness is a door to peace and happiness. It is a small, narrow door, and cannot be entered without stooping. It is also hard to find. But no matter how long the search, it can be found – Why Forgive—
Senin, 16 Mei 2011
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